Our culture places a lot of emphasis on feelings. We ask our neighbors “How are you?” or “How are you feeling?” We talk about how we feel in passing conversation. “I’m so tired. I don’t feel like going to work today.” We speak these words over and over like a broken record (for those of you who remember records). If you are suffering from depression, you won’t feel like doing anything. That’s the nature of the disease. It takes a lot of energy to navigate through daily life.
The holidays can trigger depressive episodes in people who are already susceptible, whether they have suffered from bouts of depression in the past, or circumstances render them vulnerable. How can a church community help those who are dealing with depression? What can a person who has depression do for themselves?
A church can look back and see who has suffered a loss in the past year. Losses are usually easy to spot. Death, divorce, loss of job, poor health are frequent culprits. As a church, we should respond to these people in love. Visits, cards and meals can help. Inviting someone to share a meal with you or an evening out is even better. Knowing that someone cares enough to walk through the dark valleys can be enough to give a person hope.
The person who has depression also has a responsibility towards their own well-being. Our fast food, overly productive society has bought into the idea of quick fixes. Go to the doctor, get a pill, and feel better. Depression doesn’t always work that way. It is important to see your doctor. Medication may be a part of the treatment plan, but it shouldn’t be the only part of the plan.
Getting well entails a little work on the part of the person who is ill. For depression, that means getting up in the morning when you don’t want to, eating a little food when you don’t have a very good appetite, and going to work when you would just as soon stay home. I have often heard people say that they will get around to these things once they feel better. The truth is they will not feel better until they do these things.
If you have depression you cannot trust your thoughts either. It is common to ruminate over all the things that have gone wrong. No wonder that people who have depression feel so bad! Knowing that thoughts can control how we feel, can empower us to make the choice to change what we think about. And we do have a choice. The bible tells to think on whatever is excellent or praiseworthy (Phil 4: 8).
While the tools to manage depression are simple, the disease is not. It takes a lot of perseverance and a good support team to help you through it. These are some basic ideas to get started. If you have depression, please see your doctor so you can get the assistance you need.
~Donita Robards, RN, Parish Nurse